Summary

One Sentence Summary

One paragraph Summary

What is the foundational knowledge required for me to learn this?

What do I hope to learn AND take ACTION on after reading this book?

What brought you to reading this book? How did you hear about it?

What are my assumptions before reading this book?

Reading Comprehension questions from ChatGPT

What ACTIONS/HABITS will I partake after reading this book?

What Questions do I have after reading this book?

What Phrase(s) can I add/validate to my mantras?

• THERE IS LESS AND LESS DEPENDENCE ON INTELLECTUALISM AND A GREATER USE OF INTUITIVE KNOWINGNESS
• This is the universal message of every great teacher, sage, and saint: “the kingdom of heaven is within you”
• The major requirement for the journey is a willingness to let go of the attachment to your current experience of life.
• The reward of letting go is a progressive diminishing of dependance on anything or anyone outside of ourselves.
• Self-awareness is increased much more rapidly by observing feelings rather than thoughts
• When that inner emptiness (or, as Rollo May would call it, “Hollow Men”), due to lack of self-worth, is replaced by true self-love, self-respect, and esteem, we no longer have to seek it in the world, for that source of happiness is within ourselves
• The corollary to letting go of negative feelings is to stop resisting the positive ones.
• “I can’t” is actually a “I won’t because I’m afraid of/to…”–it is an issue of unwillingness, not inadequacy. We are free to hang onto negativity as long as we want, from our own choosing.
• The purpose of higher consciousness is to start looking for the truth for ourselves, rather than blindly subscribing to whatever we’re programmed to follow by media or society. Becoming more conscious means accepting greater responsibility for what we choose to take personally into our psyche. We ultimately begin to realize that we have a choice–it is a questioning of everything. This affects the habits we choose, the relationships we foster, and ultimately the fate of our lives.
• one of the laws of consciousness: we are only subject to a negative thought or belief if we consciously say that it applies to us. We are free to choose not to buy into a negative belief system.
• Because what we hold in minds tends to manifest, the fear of a loss can, paradoxically, be the mechanism of bringing about the loss.
• Fact: all relationships and possessions in this life are transitory. Anger is often associated with an inability to accept this fact
• Serenity prayer: “God, grant me the serenity to accept that things I cannot change, the courage to change the things I can, and the wisdom to know the difference.”
• laws of consciousness: (1) We become what we think about (2) we are subject only to what we hold in mind–we are only subject to a negative thought or belief if we consciously say that it applies to us (3) fear is healed by love (4) Defensiveness invites attack (5) Love is the ultimate law of the universe (6) The unconscious brings to us what it thinks we deserve (7) Our feelings and thoughts always have an effect on other persons and affect our relationships, whether these thoughts or feelings are verbalized, expressed, or kept in our mind. The overall attitudes we hold about another person are influencing that other person’s feelings and attitudes about us whether we express them or not (8) like goes with like
• Our mind is so powerful that, if we hold in mind a single negative or self-limiting belief (e.g. “my relationships never workout”, “I’m always so awkward”, “I get anxious”), then that is most likely going to happen in our life.
• If our mind, by its decision, has the power to make negative things happen in our life, then it has equal power in the opposite, positive direction.
• So, the issue with discipline, is that it can lead to self-sacrafice, and self-sacrfice can lead to pride, and pride can lead to entitlement, and this entitlement is felt as pressure on the other person. It’s all vanity. We have a certain secrete vanity about what we are doing for others, and our pride of achievements makes us vulnerable to anger when our “sacrifice” is not recognized.
• One of the great secretes of relationship is acknowledgement, and the behavior of others towards us always includes a hidden gift. Even if that behavior appears negative, there is something in it for us.
• If we constantly follow this procedure, we will come to the awareness that everyone in our life is acting as a mirror.
• If we constantly follow this procedure, we will come to the awareness that everyone in our life is acting as a mirror.
• The hallmark of courage is two words: “I can”
• Here’s the key when using the letting go technique for problem solving: Don’t look for answers; instead, let go of the feelings behind the question
• More important than money itself are the emotional gratifications that we hope will be ours with the use of that money.
• It will also dawn on us that the goals which we thought money would bring us can be achieved directly
• in interpersonal relationships, presume that the other person is conscious and aware of our inner thoughts and feelings.
• The only purpose for recognizing and admitting a feeling is so that we may relinquish it.
• If we ever look at a situation and claim that a win-win solution is not possible, then that should warn us that we have some un-surrendered inner feelings blocking a possibly perfect solution
• Remember the dictum: the impossible becomes possible as soon as we totally surrendered to the situation

Preface and Foreword

Notes

This is the universal message of every great teacher, sage, and saint: “the kingdom of heaven is within you”

No single group of system owns inner peace, for it belongs to the human spirit, by virtue of our origin.

The major requirement for the journey is a willingness to let go of the attachment to your current experience of life.

Much of our suffering comes from clinging onto what is familiar, despite how much it hurts.

There is a small “self” (as opposed to the actual “Self”–capital S), that enjoys:

• impoverishment
• negativity
• being judgemental
• insecurity
• the “need” to be right
• grieving the past
• fearing the future
• craving assurance
• seeking love, instead of giving love
• self-fulfilling pessimism

Meanwhile, the Self that is actually us is waiting to be discovered, so that we may have:

• effortless success
• freedom from resentment
• gratitude for all that has happened to us
• joy
• creative expression
• win-win resolutions
• enriching optimism

It takes courage and self-honesty to see the negativity and the small self that resides within us.

Only after we have acknowledge the negativity that we’re inherited from the human condition will we have the possibility to surrender and be free of it.

We simply need to be willing to acknowledge and accept that part of our human existence.

By accepting it, we transcend it.

The mind, with its thoughts, is driven by feelings, and each feeling is the cumulative derivation of many of thousands of thoughts.

Because most people repress, suppress, and try to escape from their feelings, the suppressed energy accumulates and seeks expression through psychosomatic distress, bodily disorders, emotional illness, and behavioral and interpersonal issues.

The accumulated feelings block spiritual growth and awareness.

Side note: This is exactly what Michale Singer talks about in his book, “The Untethered Soul”

Here are the improvements we see when we let go:

1. Behavioral: There is less and less need for escapism via drugs, alcohol, entertainment, or excessive sleep.
   • Consequently, there is an increase in vitality, energy, presence, and well-being
2. Physical: Physical disorders resolve themselves with a change in attitude
3. Interpersonal Relationships: An increase capacity to love. Conflicts with others decrease while job performance increases.
   • self-sabotaging behaviors arising from guilt progressively subside
   • THERE IS LESS AND LESS DEPENDENCE ON INTELLECTUALISM AND A GREATER USE OF INTUITIVE KNOWINGNESS

Chapter 1: Introduction

Summary

The answer you seek is within you, and ready to be re-discovered

Notes

The chapter opens us with so many hard truths that other people, including myself, have done to “find” that process–yoga, mediation, Jungian studies, acupuncture, fasting, etc.

Confusion is our salvation, for in the confused state, there is still hope. Confusion is the antithesis to other people’s answers and ideas. As long as you are confused, you are “free”.

But we reach clarity not by seeking something “out there”, but rather by undoing the basis of the problem itself–the root issue from within.

It’s your own freedom which you have forgotten and don’t know how to experience.

Side note: This idea of “we have forgotten something innate” is mentioned in the book, “The Inner Game of Tennis”

What is being offered to you is not something that has to be acquired nor obtained externally. It’s nothing new either.

It is already yours and merely has to be reawakened and rediscovered.

Chapter 2: The Mechanism of Letting Go

Summary

The mechanism of letting go is the choice to release pressure, consciously and frequently, at will the moment we become aware of the pressure buildup; pressure comes as a result of involuntary reactivity. The process is just like those outlined in Michale Singer’s book and The Inner Game of Tennis: observe nonjudementally, and then let it pass while remaining open.

The real source of stress is actually internal, by how we choose to interpret events, for it is not the external stimulus that is cause of stress, but our degree of internal reactivity.

The great value in knowing how to surrender and let go is that any and all feelings can be let go at any time, any place, in an instant, consciously and effortlessly, independent of external substances, people, or events. The reward is a sudden realization that we never needed all those thoughts after all. Instead, we are the space between those thoughts, and everything we ever need to know is already known within us.

This is why warriors are those who can handle seemingly stressful events with such inner calmness through a center of strength from within. All the great teachers, from Jesus to Buddha, have asked us to look within ourselves.

Notes

The technique is releasing pressure consciously and frequently at will; pressure that comes as a result of involuntary reactivity.

All of man’s problems arise because he cannot sit still for 30 minutes alone with his own thoughts.

But it is not the thoughts or facts that make us uneasy, but how we choose to interpret those facts and the resulting feeling that arises from that choice. Thoughts and facts are painless and neutral by themselves.

It is the accumulated pressure of feelings that causes thoughts.

According to neuroscientist Gray LaViiolette, thoughts are filed in the memory bank according to the various shades of feelings associated with those thoughts

That’s why we learn best when we mix lessons with emotions.

The great value in knowing how to surrender is that any and all feelings can be let go at any time, any place, in an instant, consciously and effortlessly.

This means we don’t need food, caffeine, alcohol, or any other external substance to get out of our own head.

So, what is this surrendered state? It’s a state free of negative feelings in a given area so that creativity and spontaneity can manifest without opposition or the interference of inner conflicts.

Side note: Michale Singer wrote a book called “The Surrender Experiment”. I have not read it yet, but I wonder how it relates to this idea.

To be free of inner conflict and expectations is to give others in our life the greatest freedom. It allows us to experience the basic nature of the universe, which will be discovered, is to manifest the greatest good possible in a situation.

Feelings and Mental Mechanisms

We have three ways of handling feelings:

1. suppression/repression
   • repression is done unconsciously, while suppression is done consciously
   • arising from social and societal customs
   • suppression creates unneeded tension that leads to completely avoidable health complications
   • Feelings are commonly repressed through denial and projection; we maintain our self-esteem at the expense of others
2. expression
   • expression DOES NOT free you from emotions; it actually gives the emotion more energy
   • Just enough negative feelings are released; the rest of the negatives are repressed
   • leads to self-indulgence at the expense of others
   • Often a misinterpretation of what Freud emphasized, which is the neutralization, sublimation, and socialization of negative feelings that are then channeled into constructive drives of love, work, and creativity
   • but dumping our negative feelings on others, even therapists, is simply an expression of complaining, which is self-reinforcing and does not build a heroic narrative
3. escape
   • classic avoidance through vices or even workaholic traits
   • people want to stay unconscious to avoid the negatives because they are terrified to face themselves; they cannot handle being alone
   • The effect is the inability to truly love and trust other people, resulting in emotional isolation and self-hatred (think Gaby)

Feelings and Stress

The real source of stress is actually internal, by how we choose to interpret events.

The more fear we have on the inside, the more our perception of the world is charged with fear. How we view the world is how the world reacts to us.

• to the fearful person, the world is a terrifying place
• to the angry person, the world is a chaos of frustration
• to the guilty person, the world is a pit of temptation and sin

what we are holding inside colors our world.

It is not the external stimulus that is cause of stress, but our degree of reactivity.

That’s why people who find comfort in the uncomfortable have great resilience.

Life events and emotions

Again, thoughts create our destiny:

• the person with a lot of repressed grief will unconsciously create sad events
• the fearful person precipitates frightening experiences
• the angry person becomes surrounded by infuriating circumstances
• the prideful person is constantly being insulted

All the great teachers, from Jesus to Buddha, have asked us to look within ourselves.

Because emotions emit a vibration energy, they affect and determine the people who are in our lives. Life events become influenced by our repressed and suppressed emotions on the physic level (e.g. anger attracts anger thoughts, anger thoughts attract anger actions, anger actions attract anger circumstances).

like attracts like.

The rich get richer and the poor get poorer applies to people’s state of mind. Ultimately, those who have, get–and we all have it, but few choose to get it.

Those with a prosperity complex bring abundance to their lives.

The Mechanism of Letting Go

Letting go involves:

1. being aware of a feeling
2. letting it come up
3. staying with it
4. letting it run its course and pass through you

It’s the exact same idea behind Michale Singer’s idea of letting the feeling pass through you with openness. The first step is to allow yourself to experience the emotion without:

• fighting it
• condemning it
• fearing it
• moralizing it

It means to observe nonjudgementally, and regard it as just another wave of emotion

To be sure, the best way to fail with the mechanism is to use any of the negative techniques such as (1) repression/suppression (2) expression (3) escape

When you give up resiting or trying to modify the feeling, it will shift to the next feeling and be accompanied by a lighter sensation

And here’s why we are motivated/incentivize to follow-through with the mechanism of letting go:

The reward of letting go is a progressive diminishing of dependance on anything or anyone outside of ourselves.

Resistance to letting go

Letting go is a natural ability, and it’s best done by simply doing it.

Eventually, it will be seen that all thoughts are resistance; they are all images that the mind has made to prevent us from experiencing what actually is.

The real Self is the space between the thoughts; the field of silent awareness underneath all thoughts.

If thoughts are the goldfish, then we are the water surrounding the fish.

An example of this is when we are totally absorbed in whatever we’re doing; that state of deep work when we don’t notice the passing of time. The mind was quiet, and we were simply doing without resistance nor effort. Perhaps busy, but relaxed.

We suddenly realized that we never needed all those thoughts after all.

Inside of us, but out of our awareness, is the truth that “I already know everything I need to know”, and this happens automatically.

Naturally, there is the fear that, if we let go of our desire for something, then we won’t get it.

It is then beneficial to let go of some of the commonly held beliefs:

• we only deserve things through hard work, struggle, sacrifice, and effort
  • Side note: but how does this line-up with Carol Deweck’s book, “Mindset”?
• Suffering is beneficial and good for us
• We don’t get anything for nothing
• Things that are very simple are not worth much

Letting go of the above psychological barriers will allow an enjoyment of its effortlessness and ease.

Chapter 3: The Anatomy of Emotions

Summary

We start this chapter by first uncovering the primary goal of mankind, which is that of survival (both personal survival and survival of one’s identified group, community, and members). The mind learns so that it can survive to the next generation. Consequently, our minds have adapted to use emotions as shorthands for thoughts by using reason to achieve emotional needs. Each activity or desire will reveal that the basic goal is to achieve a certain feeling (validation, pleasure, peace, etc.). Emotions are therefore connected with what we believe will ensure our survival, not with what actually will.

This then leads us to ask: How can we overcome our emotions to heal from life crises and past traumas?

The answer is simple: Start by non-judgementally observing your negative emotions, then choosing to let them go by surrendering and asking “what am I feeling this way for?”, and then, discover within yourself the opposite positive emotions that represent the greatness that lives within you. Letting go of negative feelings, and surrendering to positive ones.

When the fear of one of the smaller emotional units is acknowledged and released, all the alternative positive possibilities that exist will becomes suddenly apparent. Mastery of letting it go is mastery over fear, and the unblocking of whole avenues of life experiences that previously had been avoided due to self-imposed inhibitions from fear.

Self-awareness is increased much more rapidly by observing feelings rather than thoughts. When that inner emptiness, due to lack of self-worth, is replaced by true self-love, self-respect, and esteem, we no longer have to seek it in the world, for that source of happiness is within ourselves.

Notes

Simplicity is the hallmark of truth

The Goal of Survival

The primary goal of mankind is survival

Every human desire seeks to ensure one’s personal survival and survival of one’s identified groups (family, friends, community, country, etc).

One of the greatest fears of humans is the loss of the capacity to experience, makes influences people to choose to believe that they are their bodies, and that they need their body to experience life.

It is therefore common for humans to look outside of themselves for the satisfaction of their needs, which leads them to experience themselves as vulnerable because they are insufficient unto themselves.

The mind is, therefore, a primarily survival mechanism through the use of emotions.

Thoughts are engendered by the emotions, and these reactive emotions become shorthand for thoughts.

Emotions are more basic and primitive than mental processes. Reason is the tool the mind uses to achieve its emotional needs.

The issue is that these emotions many times are below our awareness, leading to actions taken without a reason.

The simple way to become conscious of the underlying emotional goal behind any action or behavior is by asking yourself, “what for?”

Then, ask again, “what for?”, until you get deeper and deeper.

This is very similar to CBT and how we dig deep into the core beliefs.

When you question each logical reason with “what for?” continually, we reveal that there are feelings of insecurity and lack of fulfillment.

Each activity or desire will reveal that the basic goal is to achieve a certain feeling.

Think about this! You desire nice things because you want the good feelings that come from it, whether it’s

• validation from others
• sexual pleasure
• peace

They’re all just feelings.

Emotions are therefore connected with what we believe will ensure our survival, not with what actually will.

Emotions themselves are actually the cause of the basic fear that drives everyone to seek constantly seek security.

The Scale of Emotions

Everything emits energy, either positive or negative. In this section, we review the levels of consciousness from the book, “Power versus Force”.

Above the level of Courage, people seek us out because we give energy to them (“power”) and we have good will towards them.

Below the level of Courage, people avoid us because we take energy from them (“force”) and we want to use them for our own material or emotional needs.

Understanding Emotions

Similar to what was already mentioned in chapter two with Gray-LaViolette, all thoughts are filed in the mind’s memory bank under a filing system based upon the associated feeling and its finer gradations.

There have been scientific observations that self-awareness is increased much more rapidly by observing feelings rather than thoughts

Why might this be? Because there are thousands of thoughts connected to one emotion, so the understanding of the underlying emotion and its correct handling is, therefore, more rewarding and less time-consuming than dealing with one’s thoughts.

This section introduced a great illustration of the power of letting go, I’ll summarize here:

• Man loses passport a few hours before his trip
• reactively, the man panics, and begins negative self-talk
• With no victory from the negative self-talk, the man remembers to surrender
• The man sits down and asks himself, “What for? What is the basic feeling that I’ve been ignoring?”
  • The man identified that he is acting through guilt, shame, and fear
  • The man realizes that, while missing the plane would suck, the world still continues to function..the man is at peace with his fate
• At peace, the man instantly remembers where he placed the passport
• The man now responds with gratitude and happiness

From the above, we conclude: letting go can be very powerful in both everyday practical life situations, as well as life crisis when we are bombarded with emotions.

Handling Emotional Crises

Recall from the previous chapter that the mind unconsciously uses suppression/repression, expression, and escape to handle emotional crises.

These techniques, when used consciously, can actually be useful by disassembling the emotion into smaller peaces so it’s easier to let go, piece-by-piece. But the key word here is consciously and sparingly.

Thus, in the event of a crises, it may perfectly fine to consciously push away as much of the emotion we are capable of at the current moment, especially if it’s an overwhelming crises.

Every strong emotion is really comprised of a number of smaller, less complex emotional units that can be disassembled.

When the fear of one of the smaller emotional units is acknowledged and released, all the alternative possibilities that exist will becomes suddenly apparent.

As the disassembled emotional complex is taken apart into its emotional units, each emotional unit now has less energy and can be surrendered individually, rather than being overwhelmed with so many emotions.

Handling a crisis from the emotional standpoint, rather than the intellectual one, will shorten its duration dramatically.

Think about it: if someone loses a job, handling the loss from an intellectual standpoint will produce thousands of hypothetical situations and worse-case scenarios, producing sleepless nights.

Until the underlying emotion is surrendered, the thoughts will be engendered endlessly.

There are numerous benefits to handling a life crises successfully; the feeling of self-esteem and greater awareness gives confidence in one knowing that he can survive and handle whatever life brings.

There is an overall reduction of the fear of life, a greater feeling of mastery, compassion for the suffering of others, and increased ability to help them through similar circumstances.

Healing the Past

Another emotional technique to deal with unresolved issues, especially those from the past, is to place the event in a different context.

That is, see it from a different perspective through a different meaning. This is one of the most effective tools for handling the past.

All we have to do is give it a different meaning.

We take on a different attitude about the past difficulty or trauma, and we acknowledge the hidden gift in it

Side note: This is exactly what happened with Lauren. Although the project did not end well, I found a new band of people worth working with.

This idea of reframing the past is endorsed by Viktor Frankl (Logotherapy).

“Everything can be taken from a man but one thing, the last of the human freedoms: to choose one’s attitude in any given set of circumstances.” –Viktor Frankl

Every life experience, no matter how tragic, contains a hidden gem of a lesson

All forbidden impulses, thoughts, feelings, and actions can be resolved with iterative probing of “so what?”.

Fear of life is really the fear of emotions.

It is not the facts that we fear but our feelings about them.

So, once we have mastery over our feelings, our fear of life diminishes.

How do we master our feelings? Start by first nonjudgmentally observing them, then, let them go. It’s that simple.

Fear is the bias of all inhibitions. Mastery over fear means the unblocking of whole avenues of life experiences that previously had been avoided.

Thus, the man who successfully handles the crisis of losing a job will never again experience the same fear.

Instead, he will actually be far more creative, taking new risks, and earning higher success in life.

He will witness how the haunting fear of job loss had severely limited his performance in the past year, made him fearful and cautious, and cost him self-esteem due to his compliance with his superiors.

Another benefit of a life-crisis is greater self-awareness. This is because we are forced to take a good look at our life situation and re-evaluate our beliefs, goals, values, and life direction. It is an opportunity to let go of guilt and have a total shift in our attitude.

The part of us that wants to cling to negative emotions is our smallest self.

The world can only see us as we see ourselves.

Picture yourself as being generous, forgiving, loving, and experiencing your inner greatness. Instantly there will be an enormous increase in muscle strength as a result of positive bio-energy.

Smallest on the other hand (picturing yourself as mean, petty, cheap, etc) brings sickness, disease, weakness, and death.

Letting go will help the stopping of negative emotions.

Enhancing Positive Emotions

The corollary to letting go of negative feelings is to stop resisting the positive ones.

Whenever we experience negative emotions, it’s quite helpful to imagine the positive opposite version, and practice letting go.

Here’s an example (personal one): Imagine Lauren scheduled a 1:1 with you. You may start feeling fear, resentment, hatred, trapped. The opposite of those feelings would be courage, admiration,love, and free.

We can look within ourselves for those positive opposites emotions–courage, admiration, love, and free-will, and stop resisting them.

We then realize that part of our nature has always been willing to be positive–to be courageous, loving, respectful, and enthusiastic, but we didn’t give it a chance.

We instead thought we were punishing the other person by holding the resentment, but we have actually been repressing love.

The purpose of this exercise is to locate within ourselves that which can only be described as greatness

Greatness is the courage to overcome obstacles. It is the willingness to move to a higher level of love. It is the acceptance of other’s humanness and having compassion for their suffering.

With this increased awareness of who we really are comes the progressive invulnerability of pain.

Out of the recognition of who we really are comes the desire to seek that which is uplifting, out of which arises a new meaning and context for life.

When that inner emptiness, due to lack of self-worth, is replaced by true self-love, self-respect, and esteem, we no longer have to seek it in the world, for that source of happiness is within ourselves.

It dawns on us that it cannot be supplied by the world anyway.

When we use these techniques of relinquishing the negative and surrendering the positive, we come into a sudden, comprehensive awareness of our true dimension.

Once this has been experienced, it will never be forgotten. The world will never intimidate us again as it once did.

Outwardly, the behavior may appear the same, but inwardly, the causes for it are now totally different.

We go through life balanced and graceful.

Chapter 4: Apathy and Depression

Summary

Apathy and depression is merely a veneer for fear; behind every “I can’t” is actually a “I won’t because I’m afraid of/to…”–it is an issue of unwillingness, not inadequacy. We are free to hang onto negativity as long as we want, from our own choosing.

This leads us to ask one of the foundational questions of this book: what is the purpose of higher consciousness?

To begin with, it means to start looking for the truth for ourselves, rather than blindly subscribing to whatever we’re programmed to follow by media or society. Becoming more conscious means accepting greater responsibility for what we choose to take personally into our psyche. We ultimately begin to realize that we have a choice–it is a questioning of everything. This affects the habits we choose, the relationships we foster, and ultimately the fate of our lives.

Blame is an example of a programmed attitude that much of society accepts. When we play the blame game, we get the short-term payoff of being victimized, but at the long-term cost of our freedom–for how can we be the heros and captains of our life is we are slaves to the things that happen to us?

But here’s the trick: We have to be honest and realize that we are blaming because we choose to blame. This is true, no matter how justified the circumstances may appear to be. It is not a matter of right or wrong, but merely a matter of taking responsibility for our own consciousness, psyche, interpretations, and stories.

Every feeling has its opposite. The way out of negativity is therefore the willingness to acknowledge and let go of negative feelings while simultaneously the willingness to let go of resisting of their positive opposite.

One surprising effect of the willingness to let go of our inner negativity is the discovery that the polar opposite of the negative feelings, the positive, exist. This is the inner reality that we call our “inner greatness” or “Higher Self”, and it has unlimited creative capacity in all realms of life: employment, relationships, health, etc. In return for letting go of the payoffs that we are getting from the negative position, we are now surprised by the positive payoffs that stem from the power of our Higher Self.

No matter what others or society says, you are free to refuse to buy into the negative thought form. By refusing to accept the negative belief, it now has zero impact over our life. By that same token, If we have power to manifest negativity, then we have power to manifest positivity.

Here is one of the laws of consciousness: we are only subject to a negative thought or belief if we consciously say that it applies to us. We are free to choose not to buy into a negative belief system.

Notes

I can’t versus I won’t

The biological purpose of apathy is to summon aid. Apathy indicates a lack of life energy and closeness to death.

The way out of apathy is to remind ourselves of our intentions, which is to get higher and freer–to become more effective and happy, and to let go of the resistance to the technique itself.

It’s reminding does not help, simply look at the current fruits that apathy yields in your life–are you happy with those fruits? It’s your choice.

Most “I can’t” are often:

• “I won’t”
• “I’m afraid to”
• “I have too much pride to try, for fear I may fail”

Behind the “I won’t” is a reason “…because I am afraid”. That is how we move upwards from apathy to fear in the consciousness map.

Fear is a higher energy level than apathy. Fear at least begins to motivate us into action.

Apathy is merely a veneer for fear.

There was such a good, detailed description of the typical self-improvement path of many people, that I decided to include the whole section here:

This is the power of self-help groups: the sharing of inner experiences, from the lowest to the highest levels on the scale of emotions.

What does it mean to become more conscious?

To begin with, it means to start looking for the truth for ourselves, rather than blindly subscribing to whatever we’re programmed to follow by media or society.

Becoming more conscious means accepting greater responsibility for what we choose to take personally into our psyche. We ultimately begin to realize that we have a choice.

We can stop giving authority to all of the mind’s thoughts, and begin to question them, and find out if there is really any truth in them for ourselves–it is a questioning of everything.

We learn that doing something new means being willing to let go of pride. We look at the cost as ask,

“Am I willing to continue to pay this price? Would I be willing to let go of the fear of not succeeding. Would I be willing to let go of resisting the effort required? Would I be willing to let go of the vanity so that I could allow myself to be awkward as a learner? Could I let go of my stinginess and smallness and be willing to pay for the lessons and give the time?”

As all of the associated feelings are surrendered, it becomes clear that the real reason is unwillingness–not inadequacy

It must be remembered that we are free to acknowledge and surrender our feelings, and we are free not to surrender. We are perfectly free to refuse to let go.

We are free to hang onto negativity as long as we want, from our own choosing.

We are free agents.

Blame

Let’s first look at what makes blame so appealing.

Blame is the world’s greatest excuse. It enables us to remain limited and small without feeling guilty. If we blame others for our troubles, then we get to be the innocent victim and the other party is the bad one; we enjoy the self-pity and the sympathy of others.

But there is a cost: the loss of our freedom.

The role of the victim brings with it a self-perception of weakness, vulnerability, and helplessness, which are the major components to apathy and depression.

The first step out of blame is by nonjudementally observing that we are choosing to blame.

The right approach is to forgive, forget, and give new meaning to the context.

We can see the right approach with Victor Frankl, who chose to forgive the Nazi guards and discover a hidden gift in his experience at the concentration camps.

But here’s the trick: We have to be honest and realize that we are blaming because we choose to blame. This is true, no matter how justified the circumstances may appear to be.

It is not a matter of right or wrong, bt merely a matter of taking responsibility for our own consciousness, psyche, interpretations, and stories.

To overcome blame, we get to be willing to surrender all of the little payoffs for something far greater.

Depression and apathy result from the willingness to hang on the small self and its belief systems, plus the resistance to our Higher Self, which consist of all the opposites of the negative feelings.

Who would I become reversed what I was willing to accept and resist?

Every feeling has its opposite. The way out of negativity is therefore the willingness to acknowledge and let go of negative feelings while simultaneously the willingness to let go of resisting of their positive opposite.

The tricky thing with blame is that the mind can make up reasonably sound justifications. “I don’t have time”, “I don’t deserve to give it up”, “I can’t forget what she did to me”, “she should apologize to me first”,etc.

In this case, two things are operating:

1. clinging to negativity and smallness within us
2. resisting the positive and greatest within us

Here is one of the laws of consciousness: we are only subject to a negative thought or belief if we consciously say that it applies to us. We are free to choose not to buy into a negative belief system.

This is life changing. No matter what the media says, whether it’s a recession, dating crisis for young men, or the decay of American society, I am free to refuse to buy into the negative thought form.

We can say instead:

• “unemployment does not apply to me”
• “recessions do not apply to me”
• “gender wars do not apply to me”
• “mental sickness does not apply to me”
• “loneness does not apply to me”

By refusing to accept the negative belief, it now has zero value over our life.

If we have power to manifest negativity, then we have power to manifest positivity.

Choosing the positive

One surprising effect of the willingness to let go of our inner negativity is the discovery that the polar opposite of the negative feelings, the positive, exist.

This is the inner reality that we call our “inner greatness” or “Higher Self”.

In return for letting go of the payoffs that we are getting from the negative position, we are now surprised by the positive payoffs that stem from the power of our positive feelings.

One example of this is that when we let go of blame (small self), we surrender to and experience forgiveness (higher self).

When we let go of payoffs from the small self, we experience the unlimited capacity that is our higher self.

Our high self can CREATE:

• employment opportunities
• situations for the healing of relationships
• opportunities to give and receive love
• empower new financial, health, and well-being goals

This empowerment results in a rise in self-esteem, the return of creativity, and the opening of a positive vision of the future that replaces fearlessness.

If you have trouble practicing positivity, you can tell yourself that you’re just doing an experiment, for purpose for which is to learn. The purpose is to also become familiar with the laws of consciousness and witness, in real time, the phenomenon to occur.

The mind projects on to the future with the expectation that the past will be repeated.

When we discover this unconscious dynamic, we can choose to look again at the emotional complex disassemble it into its emotional units, let go of each negative component, and then let go of the resistance of its positive opposite.

The more we do this, the more our perspective of the future changes, the more the world changes, and the more hwo the world responds to us changes.

Here are some questions to ask yourself when you observe your small self:

• How long am I willing to pay the cost?
• How much blame is enough?
• Is there a time to call an end to it?
• How long will I hang on to it?
• How much shame is enough?
• How much self-punishment is enough?
• When does the sentence come to and end?
• Where has my bitterness taken me?

Now, ask these questions:

• Did school teach me courses on consciousness?
• Did anyone ever tell me that I had freedom to choose what went into my mind?
• Was I ever taught I could refuse all of the negative programming?
• Did anyone ever tell me the laws of consciousness?
• Why not stop beating ourselves up right now?

We all did what we thought was best in the moment.

The company we keep

Another valuable technique for overcoming apathy and depression, and the “I can’t/I won’t” attitudes, is to choose to surround yourself with people who have resolved the issues you’re currently facing. This is one of the great powers of self-help groups.

Those who are in a higher vibration are free of the energy from their negative thoughts and have energized positive thought forms. To merely be in their presence is beneficial enough.

We are either positively or negatively influenced by the company we keep.

Chapter 5: Grief

Summary

Because what we hold in minds tends to manifest, the fear of a loss can, paradoxically, be the mechanism of bringing about the loss.

To handle the fear of loss, we have to look at what purpose the external person or object serves in our life. What emotional need is being fulfilled? What emotion would arise if we lost that person or thing that we are so attached to?

Anger is another emotion associated with grief, and results from prior refusal to accept the fact that all relationships and possessions in this life are transitory

We often feel that what has become important or comforting to us is a permanent attachment, but this is among the biggest mistakes people choose to believe.

“Impotent rage” is associated with the desire to change the nature of the world and the impossibility of doing so.

Notes

Allowing grief

Grief comes from losing something we cherish. It comes at the result of the denial of the fact that all relationships are transitory in nature (this too shall pass).

Grief comes from seeking to obtain love from outside of us; we begin by looking at our lives, identifying those areas of attachments, and asking ourselves:

• what internal needs are they satisfying?
• What feeling would come up if I were to lose them?
• Why am I so empty within myself, that I have to search for solutions in the form of attachment and dependency on others?
• Where am I looking to get love rather than to give it?
• If the person/people I’m with become happier elsewhere, how would I feel about that?

The greater our attachment to that which is outside of ourselves, the greater is our overall fear of, and vulnerability to, loss.

When grief hits, let it pass by choosing acceptance; acceptance calibrates higher than willingness, and permits us to use grief to reach new heights of consciousness by letting go of the resentments that hold it down.

The more loving we are, the less vulnerable we are to grief and loss, and the less we need to seek attachments (attachments are not limited to physical, worldly, materialistic possessions, but generally include anything outside of ourselves that we rely upon).That part of us which we refer to as our greater Self seeks to give love rather than obtain it.

For what can be obtained if it is already in possession?

Healing Loss

Because what we hold in minds tends to manifest, the fear of a loss can, paradoxically, be the mechanism of bringing about the loss.

To handle the fear of loss, we have to look at what purpose the external person or object serves in our life. What emotional need is being fulfilled? What emotion would arise if we lost that person or thing that we are so attached to?

If loss can be anticipated, we can better handle the various fears associated with the sense of loss by disassembling the emotional units.

For example, a pet dog that’s near his expiration date may evoke feelings of sadness over the inevitable loss that’s around the corner. You ask yourself,

“what purpose is the dog serving in my life? What is his emotional service to me? Love, companionship, touch? Will losing the dog leave these personal emotional needs unfulfilled?”

By following this deeper and deeper why questioning, some of the fears can be acknowledged and relinquished. Once the fear is let go, you don’t have to resort to denial and pretend to yourself that your dog will live forever.

Anger is another emotion associated with grief, and results from prior refusal to accept the fact that all relationships and possessions in this life are transitory

We often feel that what has become important or comforting to us is a permanent attachment, but this is among the biggest mistakes people choose to believe.

“Impotent rage” is associated with the desire to change the nature of the world and the impossibility of doing so.

When loss seems inevitable, many people will start treating symptoms by overcompensating with good works. A faltering relationship will have one side start acting more loving.

When the denial breaks down, and the manipulation stop working, and the fear has passed through, depression itself is what’s left and the actual process of mourning and grief take place.

But all of these emotional stages can be worked through more rapidly by the process of letting go.

What does this mean?

It means the inevitability of the emotion of grief is surrendered to and replaced by a willingness to let go of resistance and let the process pass through and complete itself

Instead of denial and resistance, you plunge into it and get it over.

Grief can either lead down destructively to anger (a lower consciousness level) or acceptance (an even higher consciousness level). Acceptance and resignation are not the same thing: resignation is a half-ass acceptance of the facts (“I don’t like it, but I have to put up with it”), whereas acceptance has an earnest and sincere acceptance of newfound perspective in light of new data.

Resignation still clings with residual resentment over the facts, whereas acceptance reaches new heights by letting go of the resentments that hold it down.

Acceptance calibrates at 350–much higher than courage (200) or even willingness (310). As bad as grief may be, it can be the door through which acceptance grants us the creative aspects of the mind to develop opportunities for new life situations and further options for growth and experience, accompanied by a new sense of aliveness.

Nearly all 12-step self-help groups follow this frame of mind with the serenity prayer:

God, grant me the serenity to accept that things I cannot change, the courage to change the things I can, and the wisdom to know the difference.

To not accept, is to prolong unnecessary suffering.

Preventing Grieving

As we have explored, the basis of all mourning and loss is attachment, plus the denial of the transitory nature of all relationships

We can begin by looking at our lives, identifying those areas of attachments, and asking ourselves, “what internal needs are they satisfying? What feeling would come up if I were to lose them?”

The greater our attachment to that which is outside of ourselves, the greater is our overall fear of and vulnerability to loss.

“Why am I so empty within myself, that I have to search for solutions in the form of attachment and dependency on others?”

We begin to look within ourselves at our own areas of immaturity.

Specifically, we need to examine the question: “Where am I looking to get love rather than to give it?”

The more loving we are, the less vulnerable we are to grief and loss, and the less we need to seek attachments (attachments are not limited to physical, worldly, materialistic possessions, but generally include anything outside of ourselves that we rely upon).

It is in this action of letting go of negativity that we outgrow our smallness and experience and rediscover our internal greatness of joy that comes from the pleasure of giving and loving–we become immune to the losses of the world.

“Do what feels good” is both sound advice and terrible advice under different contexts: Feeling good from escaping through vices that are outsides of us leads to death, but feeling good by doing good inside of ourselves leads to everlasting life.

When the source of happiness is found within we are immune to the losses of the world.

Mid-life crises

Again, attachments are not limited to materialistic things. A woman can find herself attached when she faces empty nest syndrome, and a man can face the same if he loses the job he so desperately sacrificed for.

The reaction typically occurs suddenly in middle age, due to many years of pre-existing denial.

There is often a lack of facing the inevitable and making plans for other life activities that would gratify the same inner needs which, in these cases, are feelings of:

• self-esteem
• importance
• wanting to feel needed and significant
• the need to make a contribution and be productive

So, anticipation of the inevitable and preparing for it now both bring relatively minor discomfort compared to traumatic grief and loss at a later date.

Here’s a VERY IMPORTANT question to ask yourself in all of your relationships: “If their happiness were best served by leaving me, how would I feel about it?”

This question, and the inner work that follows from it, reveals the degree to which we are trying to restrict and control the other person–in which case, it’s not love, rather another form of attachment.

But as we have discussed, it is only the small part of the self that becomes attached; the greater Self is immune to attachment. The purpose of letting go is to de-energize the habits of the small self so that they no longer run us; then, we are free to expand into greater awareness of our higher Self.

That part of us which we refer to as our greater Self seeks to give love rather than obtain it. For what can be obtained if it is already in possession?

Immunity to grief of loss occurs when we replace dependence on the small self (the personality) with dependance on the higher Self (the Divinity within).

We look for security to the Self, which is eternal, instead of the small self, which is transitory.

Chapter 6: Fear

Summary

The fact that we can face fear and surrender it permits us to move up instantly to courage; on the other side of fear is new heights of consciousness.

With more experience, you will inevitably get better, but only if you choose to start, and you can only start if you choose to drop your ego, have humility, and laugh at yourself when you’re failing in the beginning. The reward for the willingness to be laughed at is continued, sustained, effortless, compounding success.

By letting go of fear and letting go of the resistance of love, our capacity to give love increases progressively, and the loving energy has the capacity to heal ourselves as well as others. This love is intrinsically within us, and this love can be rediscovered by letting go of fear.

We have conscious fantasy that the fear is keeping us alive. Recall from chapter 3 the anatomy of emotions, and how emotions are connected with what we believe will ensure our survival, not with what actually will. Fear is associated with our primitive survival mechanisms. We believe that we become vulnerable if we let go of fear.

But as we just mentioned, like attracts like. Fear is what binds us to the real dangers of life. It is fear and guilt that become actualized from the mind and hurt us in the long run.

Does that mean we stay unprotected and take hasty risks? Certainly not. Instead, take the same protective actions out of love rather than fear. It’s the same difference between passion and aggression–one is based on love while another on fear.

99% of guilt has ZERO to do with reality. Reprogram your own mind.

Notes

As we let go of fear, we find that behind it, there is often anger at the object of fear itself. The willingness to let go of fear reveals the anger at the object of fear itself, which brings us up higher in consciousness than fear.

The fact that we can face fear and surrender it permits us to move up instantly to courage.

Fear of Public speaking

When we stop being afraid, we notice that it’s just a feeling. Or, as Teddy Roosevelt said:

“There is nothing to fear, but fear itself”

Another law of consciousness: what one holds in mind tends to manifest in reality.

Thus, fear engenders fear; the more we cling to fear, the more likely the fear will actualize.

Humor is valuable in public speaking; it is a way of just being at one with the humanness of the audience, and discovering their compassion.

With more experience, you will inevitably get better, but only if you choose to start, and you can only start if you choose to drop your ego, have humility, and laugh at yourself when you’re failing in the beginning. The reward for the willingness to be laughed at is continued, sustained, effortless, compounding success.

The Healing Effect

Jerry Jampolsky wrote a book titled, “Love is letting go of Fear”. The title itself is true.

Think about it. When I was paranoid, Sutanay responded with openness and empathy. And it worked.

High levels of consciousness are capable of healing, transforming, enlightening, and inspiring others. People like Mother Teresa, MLK, and Roger Banister are examples.

By letting go of fear and letting go of the resistance of love, our capacity to give love increases progressively, and the loving energy has the capacity to heal ourselves as well as others.

The only drawback of healing someone through conscious loving thoughts is that illness returns as soon as the highly conscious person leaves, unless the sick person learns to elevate their own consciousness.

Although hospital beds are filled with patients who have families wishing their recovery, many of these wishes/thoughts are based in fear, anguish, guilt, and ambivalence.

It was Jesus who said that with faith, we can move mountains and have the power to heal.

The saint, or person of high consciousness, is defined by one who has removed the clouds of negativity and radiates the full healing power of the sun.

It’s the same power that comes from the unconditional love of a mother or father.

This same love is intrinsically within us, and this love can be rediscovered by letting go of fear.

Owning the “Shadow”

Carl Jung said that the self cannot become healed and whole unless we look at and acknowledge the shadow.

This shadow, or “collective unconscious” represents everything that we most dislike admitting about ourselves (the term, “collective unconscious” means that everyone has these thoughts and fantasies).

There is nothing secret about the fears that we all hide–fear of appearing dumb, ugly, unlovable, and a failure.

The average human would much rather project his shadow onto the world, condemn it, and see it as evil, thinking that his problem is to battle with evil in the world.

In actuality, the problem is merely to acknowledge, non-judgementally, the presense of such thoughts and impulses within ourselves.

By acknowledging non-judgementally, they become quiet. Once they are quiet, they no longer unconsciously run us.

The fear of the unknown is really the fear of the depths of our consciousness, or our shadow.

In addition to love, another helpful cure is…HUMOR! :)

Once looked at and acknowledged, the shadow no longer has any power.

It is only our fear of these thoughts and impulses that give them any power, much like how reactive fear to a bully only makes the bully stronger, since that is what he’s expecting.

Once we become aquatinted with our shadow, we no longer have to project our fears upon the world, and they begin to evaporate rapidly.

This is what makes people so attracted to action, violent films and TV programs, like films by Quentin Tarantino, Serial Killer documentaries, etc.

Because what is being acted out, on screen, are all the forbidden unconscious fantasies in our own psyche.

Once we are willing to look at the same internal films that represent our shadow within ourselves, the attraction towards these violent forms of entertainment disappears.

The unconscious mind is not polite. It thinks of gross concepts.

Look deep within yourself next time somebody cuts you off in traffic, and picture what you would really do to that person if you were strictly honest with yourself and did not censor the images coming to mind. That’s the way the unconscious thinks.

The reason why a sense of humor is useful because these images are comical to look at. There is nothing awful about it, just the way the unconscious handles images. It jsut means that you have gotten honest and faced how the human animal mind operates in this dimension.

It takes a lot of energy to keep the shadow buried and to suppress our multitude of fears. The result is energy depletion. On the emotional level, it is expressed as an inhibition of the capacity to love.

In the world of consciousness, like attracts like, so we can either attract fear or love. You choose.

So, it seems clear that fear is not the way, yet, most people cling to fear. Why?

We have conscious fantasy that the fear is keeping us alive. Recall from chapter 3 the anatomy of emotions, and how emotions are connected with what we believe will ensure our survival, not with what actually will. Fear is associated with our primitive survival mechanisms. We believe that we become vulnerable if we let go of fear.

But as we just mentioned, like attracts like. Fear is what binds us to the real dangers of life. It is fear and guilt that become actualized from the mind and hurt us in the long run.

Does that mean we stay unprotected and take hasty risks? Certainly not. Instead, take the same protective actions out of love rather than fear. It’s the same difference between passion and aggression–one is based on love while another on fear.

Guilt

Guilt is a substitute for a sense of reality in a mind that is underdeveloped; it is a learned behavior to prevent repetition of a mistake.

99% of guilt has ZERO to do with reality

Most pious, meek individuals are actually riddled with guilt.

Guilt represents death just as love represents life.

It is because of our own inner innocence that we have brought into all the negativity of the world and allowed it to kill our aliveness, destroy our awareness of who we really are, and sell us the pathetic little smallness for which we have settled.

To recognize this means to be conscious.

Think about it. What does it mean to “raise our consciousness”? To be programmed by other people on how to think? To get someone else’s version of truth?

Most consciousness programs boil down to this essential point: Become aware of what we are buying into, and what we are accepting daily.

Similar to what Scott Adams echos, “humans are moist computers”; we are blank slates ready to be reprogrammed at any time.

We are the innocent space in which the program is occurring.

When we look at all of this, we are going to get angry; anger is better than apathy, depression, or even grief!

You’re depressed because you accepting someone else’s programming that life is bad! Get angry at yourself for falling for the scam, and get going!

It means to take charge of our minds instead of handing it to whatever media we permit it to program ourselves. Media, people, hallway conversations, background noise. It’s all garbage in, garbage out. Be ruthless with whom you permit to enter into your consciousness.

We will enjoy starting to let the feelings come up, seeing them for what they actually are, clearing out all the garbage, and letting it all go.

It’s time to re-own our own power and stop giving it away to every passing scammer who jingles our fears and shakes loose our energy.

Side note: this is just like when the business girl on twitter posted the worst side of Paris riot, claiming this was the future. It does not apply to me.

As the quantity of guilty fear, and the energy that accompanies it, are relinquished, we will notice that physical diseases and symptoms begin to disappear.

Remember: most hospital beds are filled due to EII–Emotionally Induced Illness.

The capacity to love ourselves in the form of increased self-esteem returns and with it comes the capacity to love others.

We become aware of all the guilt-mongers in life, and ask ourselves: “could we not achieve the same result out of love, rather than fear and guilt?”

Is guilt the only reason why we don’t stab our neighbors?

Chapter 7: Desire

Summary

If you desire something, then you admit that it is outside of your and something you must work to obtain. Desire blocks receiving and results in fear of not getting. The energy of desire is, in essence, a denial that what we want is ours for the asking.

Although the world may appear stingy and hostile towards other people, there is zero reason why we should buy into this paradigm. (remember the second law of consciousness? We are only subject to a negative thought or belief if we consciously say that it applies to us). It’s a shift in our we label the universe.

Totally surrendering desire means being okay if you finally obtain the goal, AND being okay if you never obtain the goal. It’s being content with your inner self, understanding that it’s not the external world that builds us up, but our inner work. It means giving up the sentimental idea of self-sacrifice, pain, and suffering that comes with achieving goals.

Just choose to be that person and let go of the block of desiring to be that way.

The way we become that exciting person whom people want to know is to simply picture, in your mind, the kind of person we want to be and surrender all the negative feelings and blocks that prevent us from being that.

“What we hold in mind tends to manifest”

Notes

Here again, the essential point of freedom is whether we have chosen consciously to fulfill a certain want, or whether we are being blindly run by unconscious programs and beliefs.

Desire as an obstacle

The main illusion we fall victim to is the following statement: “The only way I’ll get what I want is by desiring it; if I let go of my desires, then I won’t get what I want”

The reality is, the reverse is true: desire can preclude our attempt to actually obtain that which we seek.

Why? Because the way something comes into our life is because we have chosen it. It was the result of intention. The desiring was actually the obstacle to its achievement.

With intention, we can achieve that which we sought out to get, in spite of desire.

To say you desire something means you are not already in possession of it.

Desire blocks receiving and results in fear of not getting. The energy of desire is, in essence, a denial that what we want is ours for the asking.

This is in contradiction with the classical programming of the world. We are used to associating hard work with classical “Protestant work ethic”–qualities such as self-sacrifice, asceticism, will power, effort, etc.

What the author suggests instead is to operate in a freer state: acknowledge nonjudgmeltally and let go of desire. In a freer state, that which is chosen manifests in our life effortlessly. We surrender the desire of emotion and surrender the resistance to merely picturing ourselves already achieving our goal, and allowing it to happen because we see that it is already ours.

It’s a shift in our we label the universe.

For some people, they view the universe as negative and reluctant, and they therefore reap that which they sow. On the other hand, those on a freer state who operate at a higher level of consciousness, view the universe as loving, giving, and unconditionally approving–is is ours for the asking.

Although the world may appear stingy and hostile towards other people, there is zero reason why we should buy into this paradigm. (remember the second law of consciousness? We are only subject to a negative thought or belief if we consciously say that it applies to us).

Totally surrendering desire means being okay if you finally obtain the goal, AND being okay if you never obtain the goal. It’s being content with your inner self, understanding that it’s not the external world that builds us up, but our inner work.

It means giving up the sentimental idea of self-sacrifice, pain, and suffering that comes with achieving goals.

Society especially will fight this. If we suddenly becomes successful almost effortlessly, people are programmed to be envious. It really annoys them that we didn’t have to go through anguish, pain, and suffering to get here. They want to believe that success must come at the cost of pain and suffering.

Having–Doing–Being

The general progression of the levels of consciousness, from lowest to highest, is to move from: (1) havingness (2) doingness (3) beingness

At the lower levels of consciousness, it is what we have that counts:

• it is what we have that we desire
• it is what we have that we value
• it is what we have that gives us our self-image of worth and position in the world

Once our basic needs are fulfilled, we have the power to provide for the needs of others and our dependents; the mind begins to becomes more interested in doing.

It’s at this point that we begin to move to a different social set, in which what we do in the world is the basis for our value and how others rate us.

As our consciousness grows, we see that loving service to others automatically results in fulfillment of our own needs (this does not mean sacrifice; service is not the same as sacrifice).

People now seek our company; not because of what we have, not because of what we do, but because of what we have become.

Because of the quality of our presence, people just want to be around us and experience us. We become described as a charismatic person.

This level of beingness is typical of self-help groups.

In self-help groups, no one is interested in what others do in the world or what they have. They are only interested in whether or not we have achieved certain inner goals (honesty, openness, sharing, lovingness, willingness, humility, etc.)

Glamour

If we begin to look at something we want, we begin to distinguish between the thing itself versus its glamour–we observe nonjudgementally the disparity between what a thing is, in it of itself, and the glamour that we have attached to it, which leads to disillusionment.

This happens frequently, when we chase a goal, finally achieve it, and then realize how futile that chase was compared to what we get.

Why does this happen? Glamour. The thing itself does not coincide with out pictures of it.

The man who works a corporate job just to get to the top is upset when he realizes that he does not get admiration, but instead, a whole bag of viciousness, competition, envy, and dishonest manipulation that occur to people in power, including paranoid attacks by competitors. He finds that his energy is so drained that he has no energy left over for his personal life; his relationships are impaired. At the end of it all, when he retires or passes away, no one will even remember who previously held his position.

This is exactly what is in line with what Earl Nightgale speaks of:

Just choose to be that person and let go of the block of desiring to be that way.

The way we become that exciting person whom people want to know is to simply picture, in your mind, the kind of person we want to be and surrender all the negative feelings and blocks that prevent us from being that.

“What we hold in mind tends to manifest”

The power of Inner Decision

Your belief system is everything; never sell yourself short.

What do we mean by this? It means catching your habitual self limiting beliefs and transcending them.

You’re not “awkward”–you simply have not practiced charisma enough. In this phrasing, the opportunity to become a people’s magnet is within your reach if your surrender your limiting beliefs that it’s beyond you and accept the belief that you can change.

Our mind is so powerful that, if we hold in mind a single negative or self-limiting belief (e.g. “my relationships never workout”, “I’m always so awkward”, “I get anxious”), then that is most likely going to happen in our life.

The corollary is obviously true:

If our mind, by its decision, has the power to make negative things happen in our life, then it has equal power in the opposite, positive direction.

Chapter 8: Anger

Summary

Notes

Using Anger Positively

Byproduct of anger is action–it can either be used constructively for our good or destructively for our downfall.

Self-Sacrifice

That which we want, desire, and insist upon from another person is felt by them as pressure. (this applies to dating as well!). They will, unconsciously resist. The resistance is because pressure is always felt by us as a denial of choice–we don’t want to feel obligated to do shit!

So, the issue with discipline, is that it can lead to self-sacrifice, and self-sacrifice can lead to pride, and pride can lead to entitlement, and this entitlement is felt as pressure on the other person. It’s all vanity. We have a certain secrete vanity about what we are doing for others, and our pride of achievements makes us vulnerable to anger when our “sacrifice” is not recognized.

In addition to perspective, the way out of this type of anger is to radically change how we view what we do for others–a gift, with no strings attached, given from our overflowing cup of abundance.

We can choose to experience the joy of being generous with others as its own reward.

Acknowledgement

One of the great secretes of relationship is acknowledgement, and the behavior of others towards us always includes a hidden gift.

Even if that behavior appears negative, there is something in it for us.

Very often, that “something” appears in the form of a signal to us to becomes more away.

Side note: This is EXACTLY my experience with listening to Chance. We both have never started businesses, yet I used pride and a stable job to think I was somehow any more knowledgeable than him

If we constantly follow this procedure, we will come to the awareness that everyone in our life is acting as a mirror.

Side note: GOOD SHIT! This is exactly the quote “some people call the eyes the windows of the soul, when they are really a mirror”.

They are reflecting back to us what we have failed to acknowledge within ourselves.

This provides much opportunity for inner work, but to do this, we have to resist the temptation to indulge in making ourselves and others “wrong”.

Side note: again, this is EXACTLY what I wrote about before.

This is much harder than you may think. One way we force ourselves out of unsatisfactory situations is by making ourselves or the situation “wrong”.

Instead of merely choosing to find a better job, our smaller-self makes the job, boss, and colleagues “wrong”.

But how much easier would it have been had we just chosen to move on to a better situation?

Because of our sense of obligation, guilt is very often the block to this simpler way–because we have benefited from the situation, we feel guilty about leaving it.

As a result, the unconscious ingeniously has created the whole mechanism of wrongness to force us out of dead-end situations. But reporting to “wrongness” is simply a denial of our own freedom to choose.

Side note: I’ve done this. Blaming others has “incompetent” just so I can feel justified in leaving

The best habit of improving your relationships is one of acknowledgement. Acknowledge people when you see them; acknowledge them when they call or text you (“thanks for reaching out”); acknowledge them because it feels great when you yourself are acknowledged.

By simply acknowledging people, within a matter of days your relationships will be radically transformed.

Expectations

When we stop pressuring others others with expectations, we create an opening for them to spontaneously respond positively to us.

We can instead offset resentments by re-labeling what we have done for others: from sacrifice to love

Chronic Resentment

Another thing that dissipates anger is our mere willingness to relinquish it. Willingness is our overall decision to find a better way; to stop relying on anger, and to move up to courage and acceptance.

Ask any martial arts expert and they will tell you the same thing: anger indicates weakness and vulnerability.

What’s the point of surrounding ourselves with negative thought forms about those we view as enemies? Why go out of our way to hold onto them as enemies by stockpiling resentments and negativity in ourselves? We never know whom, in a later chapter of life, we are going to need as a friend.

The letting go technique frees us from having to keep track of the “wrongs” that people have done.

The negative environment you’re in will continue until you relinquish your inner anger. Then, suddenly, people with that same anger quality will disappear from our life.

Chapter 9: Pride

Summary

Notes

The prideful feeling of “I have all the answers”, blocks our growth and development.

Vulnerability of Pride

The prideful person is constantly on the defense because of the vulnerability of image, inflation, and denial. It is energy intensive because the prideful are constantly preoccupied with defending their lifestyle, image, beliefs, and values.

That which inflates the ego does not result in inner strength; it actually increases the overall level of fear.

This introduces the next law of consciousness:

Defensiveness invites attack

This is what separates self-esteem from pride: Self-awareness of one’s true value is characterized by lack of defensiveness.

A higher feeling state than pride is that of love. If we love our friends, family, country, accomplishments, and assets (rather than be prideful of them), it means that there is no question of their worth in our mind; we no longer have to be on the defensiveness.

When true recognition and knowledge replace opinion (which is part of pride), there is no room for argument.

Our sheer love and appreciation for something is a solid position that cannot be assailed.

Humility

The attempt to suppress pride out of guilt does not work.

It is not anymore helpful to label the energy of pride as “sin” and to suppress it in ourselves out of guilt, or pretend that we do not experience it.

Joy and Gratitude

We can recognize our proneness to pain by looking at the kind of reactions we are hoping to elicit from others by our choices and behavior.

This includes mannerisms, clothing, and the possessions we choose, the address which we live, the home we have.

The opposite of prideful acquisitiveness (which brings envy, and thus fear and defensiveness) is simplicity. Simplicity does not mean poverty of possessions; rather it’s a state of mind. Having lots of money, holding it in investments, and not flaunting it, while wearing basic clothing, dismisses envy and criticism.

Possessiveness and attachment occur as a consequence of pride.

Opinions

We can reduce our vulnerability by letting go of the desire to possess; instead of saying “mine”, we can use the word “a”–saying “a shirt” instead of “my shirt”.

Likewise, if we view one of our thoughts as “an opinion” rather than “my opinion”, or “a philosophy of living” versus “my philosophy of living”, the feeling tone changes. If opinions are viewed only as “an opinion”, then there is no longer the vulnerability to prideful anger. Remember, we don’t own ideas, only the execution of our actions.

Everyone and their mother has an opinion about everything. So what? Do you really want to spread out your vulnerability to attack with all the passing thoughts you call “yours”?

If we tell somebody that we do something because we get enjoyment out of it, there is really nothing much they can say about it, since it’s literally a preference. But if we infer that we do it because we are right/superior in doing it, we will instantly see their hackles go up because they, also, have an opinion on what is right.

Our values are preferences. We hold them because we love them, enjoy them, and get pleasure from them. If we hold them in this context, we will be left in peace to enjoy them.

The reason pride arouses attack is because of the inference of being “better than”.

Chapter 10: Courage

Summary

Notes

The Courage to Let Go

The hallmark of courage is two words:

“I can”

It’s easy to jump from any of the lower levels of energy up to courage by merely affirming our courage to look at that which scares us.

Often, what scares us can be our own feelings and our ability to handle them.

But the mere willingness to look at and begin to handle them increases our self-esteem.

Side note: This is exactly what Jordan Peterson talks about.

We all know it takes courage to face fear, which is why part of the human spirit looks with admiration and nobility at those who exhibit courage in the face of fear.

Despite all of their negative programming and fears, courageous people go forward in life, with ZERO guarantee and knowledge that things are going to get better

Therefore, courage increases our self-respect and brings us the respect of others.

There is literally no room for shame when our courage brings the respect of others.

Self-Empowerment

On the level of courage, the emphasis is on doing/ACTION.

The belief that, if we are willing to put fourth effort, we can obtain what we want.

People on the level of courage are the doers of the world.

Because we are self-sufficient, we have the ability to give to others without sacrificing, because other people are no longer being looked at primarily as a means of help, survival, or support.

When we are in a state of courage, we know that we have the capacity to make a difference in the world, not just gain something from it for ourselves.

Because of the inner confidence, we are much less concerned with security.

With courage, our sense of self-worth is not diminished by looking at areas that need improvement. As a result, energy, time, and effort are put into self-improvement.

With courage, there is capacity to look within ourselves to examine our belief systems, ask questions, and seek new solutions. Rollo May writes about this to where he dedicates an entire chapter on courage. May wrote:

" Nietzsche one proclaimed “error is cowardice”, meaning that the reason we do not see truth is because we do not have enough courage.

To find the truth, and consequently the answers to your questions, one must have the courage to venture–whether one arrives at the best answer depends very intimately on the degree of one’s maturity and courage. The finding of truth hinges greatly on the investigator’s inner qualities of probity and courage.

Truth is often missed not because it was unsought, but because the intention always was to find again some preconceived opinion–something that looks or sounds familiar–or at least not to wound some favorite idea. With this intention, truth is often missed.

To seek truth is to risk discovering what one hates to see "

There is a willingness to experience uncertainty, periods of confusion, and temporary upset because, underneath the temporary discomfort, we have a long-term transcendent goal.

Awareness of others

Because of the letting go of much negativity, there is a desire and a capacity to love and to have loving relationships. There is balance between work, enjoyment, and love, without the necessity of over-ambition and “workaholism”.

People at this level often state that they want jobs which will be of some benefit to the world; they want to feel that there is more meaning to their job than just a salary.

Personal growth is important, and there is awareness on this level that our life is either positively or negatively influencing those around us.

Through courage, the world is viewed as challenging and therefore presenting opportunities for growth, development, and new experiences.

Through courage, success breeds success, and the rate of success becomes increasingly faster.

Chapter 11: Acceptance

Summary

Notes

Everything is perfect as it is

The way people appear to us from this space is that everyone is actually doing the best they can with what they have at the moment.

We see that all of life is evolving towards its perfection, and we are in sync with the laws of the universe and consciousness.

When we are in the lower energy field, we seek to obtain love externally; when we are at acceptance, we seek to give love abundantly from within ourselves; many of the blocks to it’s awareness have been surrendered.

Acceptance of Self and Others

Another characteristic of the level of acceptance is that we are no longer concerned with moralistic judgement–what is “good” and “bad”.

It simply becomes obvious with what “works” and “doesn’t work”–what is constructive and destructive.

In replacing “bad” with destructive, we remove guilt. We recognized that, if we had known better, we would have done so differently (“forgive them lord, for they do not know what they are doing”–Luke 23:34).

There is no longer neediness in the form of dependency from others, because there is nothing we feel we need to “get” from them.

Although negative thoughts and feelings do arise, they are less and less frequent, and are handled with great ease.

Personal Responsibility

There is awareness that all negative feelings are our own problem, and there is no longer outside of ourselves for their resolution.

There is an earnest regard for the growth of our consciousness, often manifested in meditative practices, spiritual retreats, humanitarian efforts, and the like.

What becomes increasingly important is that we are becoming, not what we have or do.

Chapter 12: Love

Summary

Notes

Love in everyday life

That which we freely give to life flows back to us because we are equally part of that life.

Like ripples on the water, every gift returns to the giver.

What we affirm in others, we actually affirm in ourselves.

Once we become willing to give love, the discovery quickly follows that we are surrounded by love and merely don’t know how to access it.

Love heals

Once you become loving, there are certain things you can never do again.

Lovingness is a way of being that transforms everything around you because of the radiation of that energy. As a result of the misuse of love in popular culture, people are skeptical if you tell them you love them. Therefore you love such people without telling them.

Unconditional love

Gratitude for the state replaces pride in accomplishment.

Out of humility, all opinions about others are surrendered because we realize that no one can help being what or who they are. Love knows this truth and takes no position.

Unconditional love is a love that doesn’t expect anything from others.

When we become loving, we have no limits or demands on others that they should be a certain way in order to be loved. We love them no matter how they are. Even if they’re obnoxious!

We feel sorry for the criminals that they saw a life of crime as their best option.

When love is unconditional, there is no attachment, expectation, hidden agenda, strategy, or bookkeeping of who gives what to whom.

It is given without requirements. No strings attached. We surrender all conscious and unconscious expectations of other people.

Even when people make mistakes, we love them. A key to making love unconditional is the willingness to forgive.

With forgiveness, events and people are re-contextualized and re-labeled as simply “limited”, rather than “bad” or “unlovable”.

With humility, we are willing to relinquish pur perception of the past.

We pray for a miracle to see the truth about the situation or person, and we surrender all of our opinions on the matter.

We analyze our payoffs from keeping our old perception of what occurred, and we let go of each payoff such as:

• the pleasure of self-pity
• the ego’s desire to be right
• our resentment and feeling “wronged”
• victimized identities

Oneness

It’s not guaranteed that our external behavior will change when we increase our consciousness, BUT what does become apparent, at least to us, is the absence of impulsivity and reactivity in our external behavior and habits.

Chapter 13: Peace

Summary

Notes

The profound impact of Peace

In peace, there is no longer conflict. There is a total absence of negativity that’s replaced with an all-encompassing lovingness that is experienced as serenity, tranquility, timelessness, fulfillment, etc.

Silent Transmission

Surrender to ultimate reality

The hallmark of this level is desirelessness–to be without external desire.

There is no need to want for anything because everything manifests itself spontaneously and automatically, without conscious effort or will.

No words seemed necessary. Communication occurred with anyone on a level of silence.

The responsibility for having chosen to experience life once again as an individual was accepted, yet without being at the effect of a belief in individual existence.

An impressive body of research in many laboratories has demonstrated that the brain perceives by a means of sophisticated mathematical analysis of frequency pattern–we are vibrational beings!

These findings have have resulted in what we know today as the holographic paradigm, which states that everything in the universe is connected with everything else, including the human mind.

Because each part contains the whole, each individual human mind is capable of reflecting the entire universe.

Carl Pribram (Stanford Neuroscience) and David Bohm (University of London) have both come to the following theory: Our brains mathematically construct reality by interpreting frequencies from another dimension, a realm of meaningful, patterned, primary reality that transcends time and space. The brain is, therefore, a hologram interpreting a holographic universe.

Chapter 14: Reducing Stress and Physical Illness

Summary

Notes

Psychological Aspects of Stress Proneness

The more emotional pressure that is surrendered and let go (e.g. through letting go of resentments, suppression, and repression), the less vulnerable we are to the stress response and stress-related diseases.

The main stress to the majority of us most of the time is not due to external stimuli, but to pressure of our own suppressed emotions.

Mental Aspects of Stress

Energy System Response to Stress and the Acupuncture System

Acupuncture, check it out.

Interventions to Alleviate Stress

Meditation

Kinesiologic Testing

A negative thought or feeling instantly weakens the body and creates an imbalance of the body’s energy flow.

Kinesiologic Testing Technique

Chapter 15: Relationship between the mind and body

Summary

Notes

Chapter 16: The benefits of letting go

Summary

Notes

Emotional Growth

We discover that the limiting thoughts and negative beliefs, which had naively been held to be true, were all merely the result of accumulated negative feelings.

When the feeling is let go, then the thought pattern changes from “I can’t” to “I can” to “I’m happy to”.

Entire areas of life can open up.

The rate of emotional growth reported by those who use the mechanism of surrender is related to the consistency with which they surrender their negative feelings–independent of one’s age.

The energy that has been long holding down the negativity is now free for constructive uses; consequently, there is an increase in available energy for creativity, growth, work, and interpersonal relationships.

The quality and enjoyment of these activities increase.

Problem solving

Here’s the key when using the letting go technique for problem solving: Don’t look for answers; instead, let go of the feelings behind the question

Don’t look for answers; instead, let go of the feelings behind the question

When we surrender the feeling behind a question, we can let go of any other feelings that we might have also have about what seems to be the problem. The answer then will be waiting for us in plain sight, and we won’t have to look for it.

Try it out: Take several problems of long standing and stop looking for the answer.

Lifestyle

“I can’t"s are surrendered.

Resolution of Psychological Problems: Comparisons with Psychotherapy

The goal of psychotherapy is readjustment of the ego to a more healthy balance. The objective is to replace unsatisfactory mental programs with more satisfactory ones.

The ultimate aim of of letting go and surrendering is total freedom. The objective is the elimination of limiting mental and emotional programs, as well as the ego itself; it is the attainment of an unconditioned mind and, ultimately, transcendence of the mind itself to higher states of consciousness of love and peace.

The two systems are based on different paradigms of reality.

Psychotherapy aims at the amelioration of neurotic patterns; letting go is designed to undo the underlying cause of all neurotic formation. Psychotherapy seeks for an improvement in neurotic balance, while letting go eliminates it all together.

A limitation of most psychotherapy is that the therapist is constricted to what the world calls a healthy, functioning ego. In this paradigm, a healthy patient is considered to be one who shares the same illusions and limitations condoned by society and the therapist.

By contrast, the purpose of letting go is to transcend the illusions of the world and reach the ultimate truth behind it (self-Realization) and to discover the very basis of the mind itself, the source of all thought and feeling.

The goal of letting go is the elimination of the very source of all suffering and pain.

All negative feelings stem from the same source; when enough negative feelings have been relinquished, that source reveals itself.

Chapter 17: Transformation

Summary

Notes

“Before reading on, make an inner decision to let go of resisting higher levels of consciousness. This means to make a decision to stop denying the higher levels to yourself, and to make a decision to let go of all blockers to happiness, success, health, acceptance, love, and peace.”

By doing this, the deed is already done, for you have set the whole experience into a context that will automatically begin to unfold.

Health

The average mind is constantly worrying about defending the body from harm; a mindset that is thinking about harms.

Underlying all of these concerns is the unconscious equation “I am a body”, which is very limited level of consciousness.

Be aware of how much energy is drained by this constant preoccupation with the body. Our mind has been continuously programmed with countless belief systems about the body.

As we have discussed, these vulnerabilities are merely product of the mind, and the body will react to what is held in the mind.

We’re not just a body.

“I am an infinite being, not subject to —”.

We put into the blank space whatever disease or substance the mind has been programmed to see as a possible danger.

A surrendered person can eat anything or go anywhere and is no longer subject to fears of contamination, pollutants, drafts, germs, EM-Frequencies, carpet, smoke, etc.

Side note: This is the new me. When I went out with friends, I was able to eat a burger while still preferring my usual diet. Guess what: I survived, and I did not any emotional backlash.

This is a shift in the following way:

“I am a body” –> “I have a body”

It is not the body that is experiencing itself, rather the mind that is experiencing the body.

The body doesn’t have any sensation; only the mind is capable of such function.

This all founds obvious, but it’s an important semantic phrasing for our mental narratives.

The focus shifts from defending the body, to using the mind.

A person who is free of negativity and guilt tends to be free of disease and suffering.

Health and well-being are generally the automatic consequence of letting go of guilt and other negativities, as well as the letting go of our resistance to the positive states of health and wellbeing.

wealth

To the mind that chooses to hold limiting belief systems and negative thoughts, money is a “problem”.

The end result of all negativity is a feeling of financial limitation, lack, and deprivation.

In this belief system, the feeling “I can’t” due to fear and limitation is often skirted by simply avoiding the whole issue (“I won’t”) of money and resigning oneself to a low social economic status of “inevitable”.

The unconscious brings to us what it thinks we deserve.

Here’s a great exercise mentioned in this chapter:

1. grab pen and paper
2. write “money” as the header of the paper
3. list down what money means in al avenues of life
4. for each listed item, write down the feelings associated with those
5. for all the negative feelings, begin to surrender them

We become surprised to discover that money, in and of itself, is NOT the most basic issue.

More important than money itself are the emotional gratifications that we hope will be ours with the use of that money.

For example, one of my own listed items was respect. We realize now that it isn’t money itself that we’re interested in, but it is our own self-respect and inner worth.

It will also dawn on us that the goals which we thought money would bring us can be achieved directly

The higher our inner self-esteem, the less we need the approval of others.

Money now becomes subservient to higher goals rather than an end unto itself.

Without being conscious of what money means to us emotionally, we are at the effect of it. We are being run by our unconscious beliefs about money and all of its associated programs.

The person who suffers from inner poverty is relentlessly driven to accumulate on the material level.

With this inner poverty, there is the whole attitude of selfishness or its correlates of vanity and false pride.

Happiness

Self-condemnation gets endlessly projected onto the world, taking the form of condemnation from others, which increases further the guilt and feeling of smallness.

Much of the attraction of the world is due to glamorization that we have projected onto it.

The State of Inner Freedom

Chapter 18: Relationships

Summary

Notes

Negative Feelings

We have to realize that almost everyone has these feelings, and that playing ostrich with them, thinking that they are wicked, or that we are guilty will not resolve them.

Instead, we get to

1. rise to the level of courage and look at our worst feelings
2. admit that they are part of the condition of being human, and
3. remember that we are only held accountable for what we do with them–our actions.

Our feelings and thoughts always have an effect on other persons and affect our relationships, whether these thoughts or feelings are verbalized, expressed, or kept in our mind. The overall attitudes we hold about another person are influencing that other person’s feelings and attitudes about us whether we express them or not

We find that, quite often, the set of feelings we hold about another person is mirrored back to us by their attitude and that, when we change our inner attitude about them, their attitude changes abruptly. The other person merely mirrors back what we are projecting onto them.

We are unconsciously influencing others all the time because of the feelings we hold about them.

So, when we are in a state of anger, we are vulnerable to the energy depletion brought by the other person’s counter-anger (remember, force results in a backlash). Paradoxically, if we really want to affect other people, then we ought ot really love them. Then, their anger directed at us will boomerang back upon them with no effect upon us.

Guilt is the next negative emotion to deal with. Here, the underlying purpose is to placate and escape punishment by self-punishment, and to elicit forgiveness.

By holding onto guilt, we bring on to ourselves all the criticalness of others and their belittlement of us; our low self-esteem is channeled back to us through others in the form of our life.

If we hold in mind that we are small and unworthy, we elicit those kinds of responses from others. If we think and believe that we are only worthy of a crust of bread, then that is all we get.

If we want others to stop being critical of us and attacking us, the answer is to begin letting go of guilt and all the feelings that have brought it forth.

It is helpful to use the following advice: in interpersonal relationships, presume that the other person is conscious and aware of our inner thoughts and feelings.

If you think you are small and weak, you are vibrating the idea, “I am a small person, please treat me that way”. It is completely optional by own own choosing.

Now switching to fear. The way out of fear is by staring at fear with full gaze, and the feelings they evoke, and then relinquishing those same feelings. You see now there is nothing to fear but fear itself.

Switching to pride. The underlying emotional purpose of pride is to win other people’s admiration, validation, and acceptance as a cure to overcome our own inner feelings of worthlessness.

The Human Condition

The kind of thoughts we have about them is very likely matched with similar thoughts they have about us.

Before searching ourselves for negative feelings, it is best to remember that these feelings are not our real inner self. (side note, as mentioned in Napolean Hill’s book, outwitting the devil). They are learned programs that we’ve adopted. This is the human condition, and to honestly observe our feelings requires a nonjudgemental attitude.

The only purpose for recognizing and admitting a feeling is so that we may relinquish it.

To surrender means that we are willingly relinquishing a feeling by allowing ourselves to experience it without resisting or changing it.

Positive Feelings

• courage
• willingness
• confidence
• capability
• “can do”
• zest
• humor
• self-sufficiency
• creativity
• win-win situations

All of these positive emotions have the same end goal: effective actions, operation, and accomplishment

In relationships, this makes others feel joined; they will seek out our presence because in it they feel complete, recognized, and content. Their response back to us will be that of love and gratitude for the blessing of our presence. In such a relationship, goals are automatically and effortlessly accomplished.

Because we are not holding negativity, there is nothing we wish to hide from the other person; this openness allows the other person to drop their defense as well. Nothing is hidden out of guilt nor fear, and there is very conscious psychic connectedness.

When we put pressure on other people in order to get what we want, they automatically resist, because we are trying to pressure them. Instead, surrender the feelings we have about what we want from the other person, and let go of the pressures we are putting on them in the form of expectation and desire. They, then, have the psychic space to become agreeable or even to initiate the desired result on their own.

Here are some important points to remember for interpersonal relationships:

1. First, look at how you secretly, in your head, feel about a person in a given situation
2. Presume that the other person is aware of those thoughts and feelings
3. Put yourself in their place, and see how you would react

The goal of the above steps is to let go of all those feelings until you can go up to a positive thinking-feeling space about the matter.

Sexual Relationships

The secret is to seek to give, rather than to get.

Chapter 19: Achievement of Vocational Goals

Summary

Notes

Feelings and Abilities

Our thoughts determine the extent to which we manifest our talents and abilities, and they set the quality and quantity of our success and failures.

side note: This is so true. On a smaller scale, when my brothers and I were out with friends enjoying a night out, we had a hand-stance competition. My older brother, who historically was the best at hand-stance, went first. I went next, but right before I went I doubted myself, thinking “well if Josh is 20 seconds, then I will probably do less”. And that’s exactly what happened; I was 3 seconds shorter than my brother, because my attitude at the beginning of a test determined the successful outcome of the competition. Contrast this with my chess match with papa, I believed I was worthy of winning, because I intentionally practice before facing him again.

But what is it that determines and influences the direction of our thoughts? It is our feelings that determine and produce the kind of thinking that will lead us to success or failure in any endeavor.

It is our attitude at the beginning of a test which, more than anything else, will determine its successful outcome

Feelings are the key to the expansion or constriction of our talents, abilities, and actions.

Negative Feelings Related to work

Negativity does not exist within a situation or event, rather it resides in our reaction to the situation as we see it. As we perceive it.

When negative feelings are acknowledged (rather than suppressed) and then relinquished, the situation can rapidly change in appearance from impossible to easily manageable, workable, and even quite useful.

The most prominent negative feeling that blocks success (professional, financial, relationship, etc) is envy. The underlying dynamic of envy is that when we see someone else winning or getting praise this triggers our own sense of insecurity.

Through envy, the other person’s success and praise triggers in us a feeling of lack or inadequacy about ourselves.

Envy is painful because it arouses our own sense of inadequacy

We paradoxically resent the person who’s success has inadvertently provoked us to choose to feel inferior.

unconsciously this resentment fuels our endless desire for strokes, which, ironically, escapes us because our wantingness and desire repel the very thing we want

As the cycle of envy continues, we feel increasingly dissatisfied and unhappy in our job and alienated from our colleagues.

This is also the source of the paranoia, “everyone is against me”, or “I cannot trust anyone”.

So, how do we finally relinquish and escape envy? The answer is by looking within.

Why is looking within the solution? Because with envy, we are constantly looking outward at others, evaluating their accomplishments and comparing them with ours.

Once we see the cost of negative feelings, and the opportunities they rob us, from success to happiness, we become willing to let go of them and whatever little payoff we get from them.

When we let go of feelings of inadequacy, we will find that envy of others disappears

Positive Feelings Related to Work

Nothing needs to be done to acquire positive feelings, as they are part and parcel of our natural state. Positive feelings flow naturally when negative feelings are not in action. Similar to visible ables underneath belly fat, these positive feelings are always within us; they’re merely covered up by suppressed negative feelings.

Letting go of negativity frees up inspiration to create an endless flow of creative ideas. There have been writers, artists, and musicians who came into a sudden breakthrough of inspiration as soon as a negative belief or self-limitation was recognized and surrendered; they attribute their success to the letting go of negative feelings through the mechanism of surrender.

Feelings and the Decision-Making Process

We can simplify the levels of consciousness (the chart from power versus force) into three major states:

1. inert
   • apathy, grief, and fear
   • feelings interfere with our concentration on the situation at hand and instead engage us with the concentration of our negative thoughts
   • “I’m not sure”, “I don’t think I can”
   • making decisions becomes difficult
2. energetic
   • desire, anger, and pride
   • positive thoughts are allowed (through our own choosing) to flow through and mix with the negative feelings
   • “go getter”
   • although decicions are made, at times they can be impulsive, driven by the occasional mix of negative feelings, such as the desire to “prove oneself”
   • Personal self-fain is the primary motivating factor
   • Many decisions are based on win-lose situation, rather than win-win (because the feelings and welfare of the other person are not taken into account)
   • We seek to attain success and mastery of the world driven by personal motives
   • Because their decisions benefit primarily themselves, their success is limited to personal gain
3. peaceful
   • courage, acceptance, and love
   • the mind is free of worry, and its ability to communicate and concentrate is unimpeded
   • solutions are win-win based
   • When everyone’s needs in a situation are met, our own needs are fulfilled automatically

If we ever look at a situation and claim that a win-win solution is not possible, then that should warn us that we have some un-surrendered inner feelings blocking a possibly perfect solution

Remember the dictum: the impossible becomes possible as soon as we totally surrendered to the situation

These three states are related to the decision-making process.

If we ever look at a situation and claim that a win-win solution is not possible, then that should warn us that we have some un-surrendered inner feelings blocking a possibly perfect solution

Remember the dictum: the impossible becomes possible as soon as we totally surrendered to the situation

Feelings and Sales Ability

A mind that is concentrated on a positive thought has the power to increase the likelihood that the positive thought will materialize in the world of events.

The most successful people in the world are those who hold in mind the highest good of all concerned, including themselves.

They do work which they love, and so they feel continually inspired and creative. They do not seek happiness; they have discovered that happiness is a by-product of doing what they love. A feeling of personal fulfillment comes naturally from their positive contribution to the lives of others, including friends, family, groups, and the world at large.

Chapter 20: Physician, heal thyself

Summary

Notes

Basic Principles

This is a bulleted list of summary for the book

The healing of Multiple Diseases

The main gist of this is: surrender your health beliefs

Healing of vision

yes

Chapter 21: Questions and Answers

Summary

Notes